One of my friends sent me the link to a YouTube video today, and I was absolutely shocked by what I saw. Ayden, a FtM who had just started his transition, called his parents to talk to them about his fiancée and coming to visit them. He was met with resistance and anger, Christian moral views were thrown in his face, and he was demoralized.
The thing that really stood out to me happened throughout the video, but I feel like it was summed up at this moment.
- At about 9:00 into the video, Aydens father calls him a lesbian, to which he responds "I'm not even a lesbian. I'm a man," under his breath. The fact that his parents cannot and refuse to accept Ayden for who he is, even to the point of calling him by this previous, feminine name is appalling and downright shocking.
Ayden is not a "special case" be any means. He's a trans man who is simply looking for affirmation in his relationship with his parents, and it's something that he can't find. Unfortunately, it's something that quite a few transgender people have to deal with from their family, parents, friends, coworkers. It's sad, and unfortunately, not much attention is paid to the transgender movement within the LGBTQ community.
If you're at all interested in checking out the rest of Ayden's story, their YouTube channel is here.
I wonder how we can create a more trans friendly environment. If it's even possible.
If you're at all interested in checking out the rest of Ayden's story, their YouTube channel is here.
I wonder how we can create a more trans friendly environment. If it's even possible.
This was an extremely touching video, I am absolutely speechless as to how underrepresented trans-gendered people are in society. I thought what was most interesting was the fact that Ayden seemed to understand where his parents were coming from, but at the same time, feel distant because they couldn't understand him. At 8:48, Ayden seems to have the only lapse in his cool and collective mannerism when he blurts out, "It is not a choice," which i found to be the most moving moment. Here is a human being pouring out his heart just to be acknowledged by his parents, it makes me wonder how religious ideologies get away with teachings that cause parents to abandon their own children. Transgender Americans truly are not represented adequately, it is important to understand that Ayden is just one of the many transgender cases in America.
ReplyDeleteThis video is extremely fascinating. I have to admit, the parents are a misrepresentation and stereotype of Christians in America. Also, nowhere in Judeo-Christian manuscript does it say that being transgender is a sin.
ReplyDeletePersonally I still struggle with pronoun references when it comes to transgender people. for example, When I look at Ayden I still regard him/her in feminine pronouns because Ayden is obviously biologically female. This is because I look a person's obvious biological features, not gender identity.
David, first I'd like to point out that this is not a scripted conversation. This is a conversation that Ayden actually had with his parents, and led to this. There are still many religions that believe that being a transgender person is a sin because you're trying to change the body that God supposedly put you in.
ReplyDeleteIn addition, it is common for most people to struggle with pronouns for transgender people, but by regarding them in pronouns that make them uncomfortable, you are, in a sense, harassing them and making them feel out of place in a body that they have so long felt uncomfortable in. Most people tend to look at "obvious" biological features, but only because they tend to match up with gender identity in society. Ayden, even without surgery, feels more comfortable as a man, and I feel that, even if you feel more comfortable addressing him in feminine pronouns (which would be like one of us referring to you as she, just to put things in perspective), you respect the wishes of a trans person so that they can feel safe and comfortable, no matter the situation.